Fashion Corner

Was watching “Project Runway” the other day (insert: appropriate pretentious Graham Greene quote).

It really says something about runway fashion that until the judges start critiquing the contestants’ offerings, you have no idea if they are going to say it’s brilliant or terrible.

Is that real panda baby carcass? I’d wear that.

This doesn’t look awkward at all. Perfect fit. If anything, the model is showing a little too much neck.

For one challenge, there was this big tan-colored poofy jacket made of seatbelts, and I was thinking, “Eeesh, that is not going to go over well.” Of course, the judges loved it. Etc. Whatevs.

Moving on to shoes, although that new style of Roman sandals for women is a passing trend, on a day-to-day basis, women are better off in flats.

When girls wear heels every day, it makes heels ordinary and therefore not hot. The only way to be hot every day is if you can do it without props.

Seacrest: out!

Bras

The other day –

although, as Graham Greene notes in his magnificent novel The End of the Affair, it is “a curious phrase – the other day, as though all days were the same except that one”

– I was thinking about bras. It’s kind of weird that girls wear like these vests every day. I feel like maybe girls should just wear shirts that give some support. Instead of having something strapped across their chests.

I don’t know, what do I know. I am not a girl.

And you may ask, was that Graham Greene quote really necessary?

No, but I thought of it, so I threw it in.

Concert Review: Every Concert I’ve Ever Been To

The Walkmen are amazing live. You should go see them.

They’re able to reproduce that vibe of their records, it’s so cool to see live. And the lead singer, Hamilton Leithauser, belts it out in his jangly way. He does not phone it in. He’s singing for the moment. Ari says his voice will be shot in ten years.

Rebekah bought a $9 vodka tonic which was more than half the price of the ticket. I put down this info only for posterity’s sake.

Sake and sake (the Japanese beverage) are spelled the same.

The Walkmen’s drummer is awesome as well. The music teeters on the brink of being completely off, but it is never off, which is one of the things that makes it so beautiful. The band is so tight.

Here are the top seven best concerts I’ve ever been to:

1. Prince (at The Aragon in Chicago, a small venue, on that symbol album, 1992
2. Radiohead (at Grant Park in Chicago, on the Amnesiac tour, 2001)
3. The Walkmen (at the Troubador in LA, on the You and Me tour, a couple days ago, 2008)
4. Arcade Fire / The National (at Radio City in NYC, on the Neon Bible tour, 2007)
5. Beck (at The Metro in Chicago, a small venue, on the Odelay tour, 1996)
6. Nine Inch Nails / Hole / Marilyn Manson (at the Rosemont in Chicago on The Downward Spiral Tour, 1994)
7. LL Cool J (in Gary, Indiana, on the Mama Said Knock You Out tour, 1991 – my first concert ever)

“The Rat” – The Walkmen

Cardinals Shirt

My favorite shirt is a St. Louis Cardinals shirt. A few times when I’ve worn it someone has asked if I am from St. Louis. When I say that I am not, the person has been like, So you’re a poseur.

I used to note that the Cardinals were my brother’s favorite team growing up, or that I am from the Midwest, or that I just like baseball in general, but now I just admit that when it comes to wearing this shirt, yes, I’m a poseur, wearing the shirt because I like how it looks.

The shirt was given to me by a gracious ex; it formerly belonged to her brother, who is also not from St. Louis. So me wearing the shirt is a poseur wearing a shirt formerly belonging to another poseur.

Double poseur power, DPP.

It is an awesome shirt and I’m gonna wear it today. If I had to wear one shirt every day for the rest of my life, it’d probably be a black undershirt, but this Fartinals shirt is my fav.

But His Face

Some of my friends make fun of me because one time I mentioned that LeBron has a really good body. In my defense, it was in the context of someone else saying that LeBron isn’t that good looking. My reason for bringing up his hot bod is to note that girls care about that sort of shit.

Which may seem obvious, but I feel like a lot of guys think only cheesy girls care about guys’ bodies. Really probably most girls care, they just allow more leeway with men’s bodies than men do with women’s.

I came upon this discovery when one time a bunch of girls I know were talking about some guy and how hot he is. I was like, “That guy is a total butterface.” [Technically I guess the term for men would be "buttisface".] The girls informed me that may be true, about his ugly face, but if I’d seen him with his shirt off, I’d understand.

And it all clicked.

That is all.

For now.

Punks.

The Big Twitch

I made a new friend a couple days ago. His name is Twitchy. He resides in my left eyelid. He is a twitch.

Does anybody know what this means? Is he going to live in my eyelid forever?

Twitchy’s arrival coincided with my first day at a new job. I don’t know if Twitchy is visible or if you have to be right up close to see him. In other words, he’s somewhere between an imaginary friend and a casual acquaintance. LOL.

Could I get some advice here?!? Eyyyyyyyyy.

And don’t tell me it’s gross, because maybe you have some gross things about you and I don’t go and point out those things, so be kind, please.

Kindness is underrated. These days everyone thinks it’s cool to be a dick, but most people don’t get that you need tender feet to avoid the land mines.

Twitchy is asleep for now, but he’s a light sleeper. I wish he would go away already.

I am going to Albertson’s to grab a cold one.

This is what I’m going to listen to:

For Emma

I love Bon Iver, the whole album. And it has the most beautiful, appropriate title for how it sounds – For Emma, Forever Ago.

Beach Volleyball

All I gotta say is, how is beach volleyball a sport?

Beach volleyball is something I play when no one has a football.

Or a frisbee.

Or any Flamin’ Hots. As in Cheetos.